The Sustainable(ish) Guide to Green Parenting

A review

I’ve always been sceptical about buying books on sustainability or minimalism as it feels a bit of an oxymoron to buy a book to be less consumerist. In general I’ve not really picked up any “eco” books because for the most part I know how to be sustainable.

Use what you have

Don’t buy in excess.

Try where possible buying from the most eco source possible (different products will be more accessible than others)

Consume less meat, clothing. Just consume less.

But, since having my second child my eco anxiety has been heightened. Like so many I thought I’d find my way with reusable nappies, we would eat less meat and be done with fast fashion. This year I’ve been utilising my library and it’s been a great opportunity to read some books I wouldn’t necessarily buy.

First of all I loved that this was written by a time poor parent who very clearly expresses that it’s important to put your eco goals where you are currently at. The author spoke very much with an “ish” tone, knowing that being a parent is tough, being a working parent, or just any and every parent who is time poor making eco choices are hard. Everyone’s ability will look different and that’s ok. It’s so easy to just feel guilty about how having children is the least sustainable choice that you can do. But you can’t let that stop you from making other choices.

I feel that you go into parenthood with the expectations of what you think you will choose to prioritise to be sustainable, and all I can say is quiet often this turned on its head very quickly. Once you accept it is going to be an ever changing journey then it is easier to move forward.

What I have found helps me continue or do better is also celebrating the “Eco” wins I achieve as a parent. At first it feels odd and a bit self congratulatory. But like anyone doing a job, being praised helps you continue to do that job. I thought that also, if you’re interested in easy (for me) ways that I’ve managed to be more sustainable then I’d love to share. Equally please share your wins too!

I feel that if you are sustainably minded this book maybe didn’t offer lots of new information or ideas that I previously hadn’t considered (for baby age). It presented lots of facts that I’m familiar with, like how donating clothes tends to end up on landfil rather than resold at charity shops, alternative routes to buying new etc. But what I think is really important is that it wasn’t doom and gloom. It didn’t overwhelm the reader with negative facts. For a parenting and sustainability book it managed to not be preachy which is exactly what you need.

The book is quite helpfully split into sections covering your child’s age, so currently I’ve only read up to the preteen section as my kids are 1 and 3. But I enjoyed the book enough to go back to when the conversation of climate change, eco living or how my children would like to make a positive impact starts happening in our household.

It was written in a very easy pick up and put down manner, in conversational language. The suggestions Gale made, felt like suggestions rather than a list of what you have to do right now. It’s made sure you didn’t panic just think and explore what your options are.

The pre baby and baby chapter, whilst I read this after having my first it meant it wasn’t super relevant to me. The list compiled of essential items and non essential, personally I think these needs are so individual, however the majority list of non essential items I totally agreed with. It was great that there was lots of additional resources given of how to sustainably acquire items giving the parent to be lots of routes to choose from.

The route we took -

For me the more organised I am the more sustainable my choices tend to be. Before the arrival of our first we attended a John Lewis nursery walk through and explained that we only wanted to look over essential products that would fit in with a small home. There were some items we knew we wanted to get new (the book covers what products are heavily recommended new or buying from an extremely trusted person) as well as had family kindly ask for gift ideas. Armed with a list of items that was essential (cot, car seat and buggy) we also managed to look at what products we wanted to source second hand.

I went to a friends house to see what items she used the most whilst her child was a baby and she kindly leant me everything she could. It also meant that when I needed to hand it back if I felt it was important I would be able to buy knowing it would be put to good use.

In the UK if you choose to have a baby shower then you don’t usually register for gifts. I think it’s seen as a bit uncouth to tell people what to buy for you and your baby. However I know people that have just be inundated with clothing that they don’t like or 8 baby comforters or if you know the gender everything in one colour. If you are having a baby shower and want to specify a gift then I would create a registry OR think about gifts that aren’t **things**.

• Take out vouchers or meal kits

• lactation consultant or osteopath (especially if it is your first)

• a cleaner or laundry service

Beyond baby and into toddler years -

Whilst is speaks about reusable nappies and acknowledges that they are hard to get in the swing with (we tried and failed so far) there are other options like cheeky wipes which can help with all your baby wipe needs. I’m also going to explore reusable swim nappy as well as reusable training pants, as I think these are much easier to “keep on top of” ie it’s unlikely your child will poop in them.

It included chapters like dressing your family, I love fashion and I find this is an area that I have had to really step back and look at the bigger picture. I am so lucky to have access to apps like Vinted where I have managed to get majority of my children’s clothing, I am also surounded by those with older kids who are happy to pass down clothing. For me I think it is so important to reach out and ask, so often people have so many baby clothes they don’t know what to do with. I also have managed to gift away to friends and family friends so many baby clothes, people are always so thankful and it’s great knowing that they are going to be worn by more children.

Eating as a family, I really appreciated that this book was written by a realistic mother. Someone who I feel knows how hard it can be to get your children to eat a nutritious meal let alone whether you should be worrying about the packaging or the amount of meat consumption.

Before having children my partner and I limited how often we had meat. There was a time when we got into the habit of only eating meat at the weekend and fish from the fishmonger. We managed to get lots of our fruits and veg unpackaged and our grains from a fancy package free store. That was a life of time and luxury!

Fast forward moving out of a city where greengrocers felt abundant and with a baby with a dairy and egg intolerance. I bought pouches, packaged food - even fruit and veg everything suddenly came in so much packaging. Once I went back to work and she became a fussy toddler I can not explain the stress I felt about her consuming enough nutrition and calories. We then turned a huge corner when she took an interest to fish and meat, which now she consumes with almost every meal. I used to feel guilty, but this book really emphasised to me to meet me where I am at. It is important my children have a healthy varied diet. I buy free from packaging where possible but I don’t opt to go without because of packaging.

When I started reading about gifts, it really shocked me what some people had written in saying. That people gifted plastic/clothing or anything that a parent had specifically asked not to do. There were plenty of suggestions of gift alternatives as well as how to approach these subjects.

I am part of a really large family, a family that loves celebrating and how those celebrations always come with gifts. But my family is also great at reaching out for ideas and suggestions. Throughout the year I make a list of ideas, I also think about what certain people might like to buy depending on budget as well as what their interests are.

This year for Christmas we recieved a family membership to the local wildlife park as well as national trust vouchers.

My daughters birthday I did buy lots of “new” items but my son I managed to get everything second hand. They are also being gifted a huge range of second hand items, money towards essential items like car seat as well as tickets for experiences and days out together.

Whilst I know I get worried about the sheer volume of toys, books and clothes the kids have I feel good knowing how many are preloved (some by older cousins, some from my own childhood) I also know that we don’t buy excessively throughout the year.

I read recently a post on here about a parent who doesn’t buy their child toys, how everything around you is a toy to a child. Personally I don’t agree, although everyday items can be used as a toy I do think there is a joy/benefit to selecting toys for a child to play with. With anything and everything it is all about in moderation.

This brings me to the section that talks about being in it together as a family, although this seems a given ensuring that everyone is on the same page or at least working towards a goal. It gave lots of ideas and suggestions of how as a family you can compromise with each other and together set goals to reach.

It really covered a comprehensive list of topics that felt relevant. The elements that didn’t appeal to me, I feel might to others. I think what it just kept reiterating was start somewhere and build on that. It also felt accessible enough to start thinking about what I might be able to do better going forward.

Going forward….Maybe this is an area I come back to at the end of the year to see what worked and what didn’t

• My daughter loves arts and crafts I’ve been buying really fun ones online, focussing on creating a fun activity that helps her with either fine motor skills or another element. I would like to try and make 50% of these crafts become sustainable by using recycled objects, or even dismantling them to use elsewhere.

• Take my coffee cup/waterbottle EVERYWHERE. Whilst coffee is one of my most important things on my agenda whilst I am out I have reusable cups at home. I need to get better at remembering these. Equally I want to start choosing either a can of drink over a plastic bottle too. These things I think are simple to achieve!

• I would love to maybe organise a preloved kids clothes and costume swap within my community to raise money for the local playgroup.

• Try to encourage gifts like subscriptions and day out tickets rather than more things that we already have.

• Food waste, dispose of better. We are lucky to have a council food bin. But most weeks it goes without being used. Kids are the worst at not finishing a full meal. That home made delicious meal that contains 8 different vegetables can be composted rather than sitting in our household waste bin.